TW: Rant: Friday 19th July: Remembering Dora and Jasmine

I used to be a regular activist: a familiar face at protests of every kind, from environmentalism, to nuclear power, to feminist struggles and free education. I could have papered my whole flat in flyers and posters and protest literature. After a while, I burnt out and got sick and tired of never seeming to make a difference, no matter how many people chained themselves to whatever, no matter how many miles walked in whatever weather or how many... Read More

Casual Whorephobia: the week that was…

Those of you who follow my twitter aren’t going to be at all surprised at what I’m about to write. Those of you without twitter may have been spared some exposure to the following happenings, but you’ll no doubt recognise the phenomenon when I have explained it.   Yesterday morning a retweet appeared in my timeline, from @realmrscommuter to an escort I was vaguely aware of, mostly because of her fabulous name -@minxy_lydia.... Read More

Blog Carnival Day 2: My workshops and activism…

Last weekend I did a flying visit to London to co-facilitate a workshop for a full day of feminist Sex and Relationships Education for adults called The S Word. I have been asked to run this or very similar workshops several times in recent months, so I’d like to tell you a little about it here, since many people reading this blog may be more familiar with my delicious one-to-one sessions than with my outreach/advocacy/activism. I actually... Read More

Hooker-tainment at Edinburgh Fringe

  Assaulted with jokes about sex workers from the very first show I saw at this year’s Edinburgh Fringe festival, I’m trying to understand why we’re supposedly the edgiest, funniest material on everyone’s lips right now. In fairness, I’ve steered well clear of the usual and big name stand up comedy here, but I can’t help believing that if it is as misogynistic as reported then sex workers will get an even... Read More

Threesomes: Playing with Couples: part 1

I am a very, very lucky person, not just for sex work, but in any work; sometimes I am paid to do things I love doing for free. I’d like to discuss one of those things today: sex with couples. Of course, more usually, the threesomes I am involved in at work involve another professional- this is also often awesome, but different, and I’ll blog about it separately soon. Managing the expectations of two people is more difficult, so I usually... Read More

What’s in a name? Musings on the nature of my work…

What’s in a name? That which we call a rose, By any other name would smell as sweet…                                                   ( Act II, Scene II, Romeo & Juliet) I’ve spent the last 4 days with the lovely Rebecca Lowrie on her Practitioner Training Course. I had been drawn to Rebecca and learning more about what she does for a while, so when she mentioned to me about a short... Read More

Accessibility post #1: Clients with disabilities

  I’d like to talk a little bit about working with clients with disabilities. I hope to be really honest about my capacities as well as my limitations, and I hope that you’ll appreciate my honesty in this. I recently saw this amazing film Scarlet Road about Rachel, a sex worker in Australia who does awesome work in her role with clients with disabilities. Rachel set up Touching Base, which refers clients to sex workers, as well as... Read More

5 ways to be my perfect client…

I started writing this as a list of things I *didn’t* like people to do, and realised it sounded rather negative and down-beat. I actually meet overwhelmingly nice people, most of whom already do all or most of these things. But perhaps if you’ve tried to approach me or another provider and been turned back, improving on one or more of these things might change your chances of a date with me or whoever you’d like to see in the future… I’ve... Read More

The Fair Trade Sex Worker

A client once said to me “why do people care more about the rights of people who pick our coffee and cocoa beans than the rights of sex workers?”. This thought has stayed with me ever since, and I’ve asked the question many times on his behalf since, without any sensible answer. I think that most people would answer that fair trade sex workers aren’t trafficked, coerced or controlled for gain, but it seems to me there’s a LOT more to it... Read More